Opinions

Excellent topic and blog Nicole!!!

This is Nicole responding to everyone. First of all since no one knows me, my son is a special needs child. I homeschool him because he learns in a one on one situation better than in a class filled with other kids. I have a set curriculum I follow that is from a company that I found on the Indiana Dept of Education website so he is getting all the required subjects. He also attends social functions, play dates and also plays certain sports. I did not mean to cause a stir I was just expressing that every parent knows what is best for their kids. Yes, I make typos but that is just that a typo and I am human I make mistakes. As far as me having other kids, yes I do and they absolutely so not go without attention and one on one help with their studies or play time. I devote all my time to my children and my husband has made that possible for me. I as a parent has to do whats right for my family and this is right for us.

LOL………..for me to jump into the discussion is like a cat jumpin' into a dog fight. The probability that everyone is going to turn on the cat is high, but I'm going to throw my 2 cents in anyway.

Most of the commentators have some experience with homeschooling. By that, I mean that they taught their child something about what goes on in school before the child went to their first day of school.

I know that my son loved to watch the History Channel and the other relatively educational channels with me and still does. Perhaps that was an error on my part, because he would rather watch them than read a book on the subject. I read to him also, but he never "took" to reading. I searched for years for his "breakthrough" book, that book that you remember as the first one that you read just for the joy of reading it. His was Harry Potter, mine was Swiss Family Robinson.

There are advantages and disadvantages to both public education and homeschooling. Nothing is perfect. Choosing either route, you must accept the fact that education is never complete; a person learns all of their life.

Another thing that you must remember; a parent will always worry if they did the best they could for their children. It is a fact of life!

We are all trying to give Nicole various opinions and no one, including me most of all wants to sound critical of anyone, because I'm far from perfect, but there were some mistakes in the letter that set off this great debate and we're all dancing around that truth and I've seen it before and I think everyone wants the best outcome for Nicole's little boy, so does she feel comfortable teaching him at home, I think yes, but she will have to do extra work herself to teach spelling and grammar and I think she's entirely capable, does she have time with her other children being so young?

Without giving examples we are left to generalize [I would prefer to use that term over stereotype].

Yes I can give specific examples of both quite successful home schooled young adults as well as those who will never achieve their potential.

Is this because they were homeschooled as many who are sent to school ALSO don't fulfill their potential?

I contend that at least there are a few more safeguards in place in the case of sending the child to school. My kids have drawn the subpar teacher on occasion too but what happens when the parent the child draws is subpar? Not accusing anyone in particular as obvious all here on forum can read and write, but we all know that there are other reasons a child is "homeschooled".

I know one child who was pulled from school upon entering middle school age as parents didn't want her wearing shorts for PE. Even though school said she could wear a skirt over the shorts, that was her last exposure to education. I saw her home alone day after day as both parents worked. Did she get her lessons at night? I don't think so as you and I both know after putting in shift work at a factory all day, one does not have the energy to plan lessons or have teaching time. This person is lost to society and has no skills to even earn their own keep. In this state there is no semester testing or mandatory programs to follow. Do I generalize to think this is typical? No but I think it is happening a lot more than we realize. This is an extreme example but before one home schools they need to find out which programs at least provide success to the extent that student can gain entrance to decent colleges. You might contact Ivy Tech about this.

I still contend that though a parent knows what they WANT for their child, they don't always know who to achieve it nor do all parents have the skills or education to administer it, even with purchased materials. I know homeschooled children whose parents have PhD's who have forgotten some of the social skills needed and their kids have had to double their efforts in college in order to play catch up in that regard and were so strictly guided that they ended up following their parents dreams instead of their own.

It's not a matter of how highly educated you are in certain cases because even with the education something can be overlooked if the parent isn't very careful and aware.

I wish Nicole good luck and would really recommend to her a home school group method at least so the kids will get the benefit of multiple teaching and work with others in a group situation. Then maybe once in high school have them take individual courses at the high school in areas where she is not an expert. This has worked very well for a number of homeschooled kids and provides that education in the social area as well...Or the Catholic deanery has a "home school" high school in Terre Haute with only about a dozen or so students and it has different people with expertise in some of the courses come in and volunteer lecture. You have options but all of them take effort and none will be perfect.

Talk to home school parents and ask what worked for them and what their kids are doing now to measure their success at it by what their kids are doing after they graduate.

..And as Leo stated, the critical thinking is what is SO important. Not just the regurgitating of facts. The other big thing to remember is that even those of us who send our kids to school are ultimately the ones responsible for our kids' education. I contend that what is taught in public school is not enough so it needs to be supplemented by the parent for a custom fit for the student. The school nor the parent alone in many cases cannot do a complete job. In most cases a better result is accomplished when both are part of the child's education as it supplies a balance. We've seen the results of what happens when a child is sent to school with no parental input and we've seen what happens when a parent forgets the importance of outside influences upon their child. It's just so much harder to accomplish both sides with only one component of the "team".

So do we have any home school parents on this forum? Do they totally home school or do they use outside sources for part of their kids' education? What are their graduates doing afterwards? I contend that their has to be a balance for the greatest success for the student.

I agree Centered. Our public schools are the best local option for educating our kids. Then add religious education at our houses of worship, trips to Y, movies, museums. Even numerous plays at Community theater both in Brazil and Terre Haute. Especially if you include student productions at the colleges. Then add scouts and 4H on top of that and when they are older they can even fit a college course in on line sometimes if they are not challenged enough at the high school or it doesn't have the courses they desire. Of course I'd like the public schools to have all that my child needs and wants to work towards their education in the field they choose to work in, but that can't happen for each child so that's where we come in to make sure they get that exposure to many career options so they can choose something they hopefully will be interested in throughout their careers.

Our schools would be a lot better if less time were spent on fixing problems kids bring from home and more on teaching but that isn't going to happen either.

Maybe what we need is that electronic bulletin board someone was talking about to share ideas for broadening our kids' experiences?

unoit:

No not at all. It's just that you have to be very careful to make sure all that is taught is well balanced. I have known young adults who have come through homeschooling just fine but the parents have put a lot of thought and effort into making sure that they are involved in other activities and have exposure to critical thinking that stems from outside sources and not only the views that match those of their parents. Church, athletic team setting, drama clubs, exposure to the arts etc.

It's just that I've seen a good many young adults who are deficient [I would not say defective as that would indicate that they cannot ever get up to speed socially and I would hope that was not the case] or lacking in social skills as while their parents paid close attention to their academic progress, they were negligent in the area of exposing them to society where maybe not everyone was in their corner or were of the same opinions as their parents. I have also seen a few of these kids turn out with the ability to spit out a wealth of factual knowledge but have a problem with critical thinking so cannot figure out a situation for themselves and have a harder time getting past that.

Briefly it is just easier for the social skills to develop over the dozen or so school aged years instead of all at once while dealing with new independence of adulthood at the same time.

As to private schools, here too the student is exposed to many others and there is a testing method in place to regulate the amount taught. It too has safeguards that homeschooling doesn't. This puts more responsibility upon the parent who single-y again cannot anticipate all the needs without a lot of effort.

Most people choose private schools to get away from discipline problems as unlike the public schools, it can turn away unruly kids. this leaves more class time for more academics. It's not until later when kids are suspended etc for causing a problem in class. I also think many times due to the desire and appreciation of the importance of education, those who are paying for it, want to make sure their child is not disruptive and puts the maximum effort into it from what is modeled at home. This is not much different than the reason why some homeschool. It's just that with private schooling the parent is delegating those who are trained in the profession to do the best job possible. I have a college degree and know quite a bit about one area. I think I could teach highschool biology to my child even but to review what I learned years ago as well as make sure I covered all the things that they needed to pass ISTEP would be impossible. If I were Nicole, I would ask someone at the school corporation how many homeschooled kids pass ISTEP? Or maybe which ones did and find out what their parents did?

I do think that a lot of subjects can be homeschooled if the parent is truly prepared but only if they admit to what they cannot teach and use the schools for those courses. this and involvement in other community activities can make a child come out the other end ready for adulthood. Isolating the child with only attention to academics the parents has mastered and no social contact does result in a deficient young adult. We may not like all the "attitude" our children are exposed to in school but they are going to have to learn to deal with it eventually and it is not doing them any favors having them wait until they are adults to start dealing with it.

In general what I have been trying to do with our public schools is make sure they address the needs of students at all levels of academics. Not just my children. I don't think any level should be ignored but no school is going to be custom for any specific child. We keep pushing for improvement but know its not perfect so make up for that in the mean time.

Every parent who is parenting is actually homeschooling to a certain extent. Like you mention, eating with proper ettiquette is one way...or when they go to a business dinner, they will be lost.

At some point the parent has to turn over the kids to another adult or group of adults and give over control with it. This allows the child to acknowledge authority other than his parent and validates it as well. It also helps them learn how to form his own opinions on certain topics.

As you said this can be through Y activities etc. but it also needs to be with activities involving thought, not just physical education as developing though process is critical in the formation of the person's thinking and out look on the world. I don't know about you but I want my child to grow into an adult who thinks for herself and can get along in the world without turning to me to see how I think before they make a decision as I will not able to be there for them all their lives.

I know it sounds a bit sad but if we've done a good job raising our kids we want them to be able to have a good life without us in case we can't be there for them. I want a young adult to be able to question an opinion of another while at the same time give them the right to their opposing opinion. In SOME home schooled situations all they know is their parent's opinion and they cannot dare question it as it is in the form of such authority. When they get out into the world they do not know how to deal with a person who might have a different opinion and they might not be able to look at them as credible. They also might not have developed the ability to form an opinion of their own and and only mimic those of their parent.

Just a lot of things to consider and be wary of if you are homeschooling as if you make a mistake, it will effect your child forever. If a teacher screws up, another teacher will come along and contradict the first and repair some of the damage before long.

This totally unsolicited opinion probably isn't worth the paper its not written on, Personally speaking, I don't know your little boy, but for myself, these days kids can't have too much education, the world is a tough competitive place to get a job and the cost of water, insurance, and groceries right here in Brazil are going up as we speak, and a large part of providing for a family falls on our little boys when they grow up if they don't have the background to earn enough money they suffer, and then more problems enter because of that. My kids were always more respectful in a teaching situation in a public classroom,than they would have been at home.