New York's creatures of fur and fin need take cover, Brett Favre has arrived in your neck of the woods.
Though it may take awhile for the admittedly avid hunter to stake out his new digs in upstate New York after a long love affair with the wooded areas of Wisconsin, the critters need hide now that 'Broadway Brett' is in town.
I'm still pretty up in the air on whether or not Favre is the answer to the multitude of personnel issues that the Jets have had. But you have to credit Jets' owner Woody Johnson for his effort to invigorate his team with some splashy free agents during the offseason.
After crashing and burning to a 4-12 record last year and becoming back page news to the Patriots run to an unbeaten regular season and a berth against the Giants in the Super Bowl, the Jets had to do something to get noticed.
They had basically become the NFL's version of the wallflower at the high school dance, standing quietly in a corner, eyes focused firmly on the floor as the pretty and popular kids got down on the dance floor.
Call the Patriots the pretty boy with the perfect hair with a slight bad boy streak that entices all the girls while the Giants could be the exciting new kid that transferred from out of town that no one knows much about.
The Jets, well, I suppose they would probably be wearing the thick black glasses and a pocket protector.
But this year could be different.
Johnson opened up the wallet for a very expensive makeover for his wallflower.
A $40 million deal for free agent guar Alan Faneca, $42 million for linebacker Calvin Pace, $35 million for defensive tackle Kris Jenkins acquired for third-and fifth-round draft picks, $25 million for center Damien Woody and then top pick Vernon Gholston, a pass rushing linebacker.
Add Favre as the cherry on top and suddenly the Jets are Patrick Dempsey in the great teen movie, Can't Buy Me Love.
I'm still not sure even all these moves can improve the Jets enough to make the playoffs in the shark infested AFC waters, but you can't fault them for trying.
If nothing else, the Jets suddenly become relevant, even reaching the front pages for a brief time before undoubtedly the Yankees' circus returns to play.
While enjoying Favre's career, I'm certainly not as big a fan of him as the Brazil Times' former reporter Melinda Quasius.
Melinda, formerly of Wisconsin and very proud owner of a Favre bobblehead, is now a resident of New Jersey these days. I'm can't help but wonder if she had a secret, behind-the-scenes hand in making sure her guy made the move somewhere near her current residence so she could oversee his final snaps.
But I wish Favre well with the media madness in the Big Apple. He's already become the biggest Jets' name since Joe Namath ruled the New York roost. At least we know that if Favre is ever seen in public wearing a fur coat like Namath, that he probably hunted and skinned it himself.