Lookin' for love ... in all the wrong places

So, it's been a while since I've gone on an actual date.

Too long to remember for that matter.

Time has been an issue for me. I seem to find my way back to my office space virtually every day of the week.

Sure, I try to take time off. But it always seems like I end up back in the office.

However, this is really just an excuse.

I work with an incredibly talented staff that knows the drill. They are all aware of what has to be done.

The truth is, I think I'm scared.

I haven't really had anyone in my life when it comes to the dreaded term "significant other" since I was in college. And that was too far back to really think about.

I graduated from college in 1997. Or was it 1996? Who knows really. I don't have time to stare at that piece of paper stuck inside a frame that states I actually did graduate from college.

But I digress.

I have a problem. A serious problem.

I tend to -- for lack of a better term -- over-analyze everything.

Once I meet someone of the opposite sex, I go through every single little detail.

Is this the right match? Did I do everything right? Was it a worthwhile evening?

Somewhere in the midst of checking over all the details of the evening, I begin to lose all confidence in myself. I start telling myself, "self, this isn't going to work. She has absolutely no interest in you."

Wow. What may have turned into a good thing was completely ruined by my own mind. I've let myself down again.

Self, you've got some explaining to do!

I've tried everything. I've spent time out and about, looking for interesting people to meet. I've been online, on those infamous dating services. Unfortunately, I refuse to completely join those things because I just can't see myself spending money for something like that. It doesn't make sense. Or does it?

The right-half of my brain tells me I'm not all that bad. You've got a lot going for you. You're intelligent, can carry a conversation, you've got a lot going for you.

But the left-half of my brain, the "self" part, talks me out of any situation.

Anyway, here's to hoping that someday, just someday, I might actually meet that person. The person who I can call my "significant other."

At this rate, however, it doesn't look like that's going to happen any time soon.