It has been said that you can do the impossible because you have been through the unimaginable. Today marks 16 weeks since Kreyton Hunter Quinn left Earth to gain his angel wings. I sat beside him in those last few hours doing the worst most possible thing a mother could ever imagine. Letting him know that he didn't have to keep fighting and that crossing over would allow him all the strength. I know he was welcomed by so many close to my heart! It is out of order not logical for a mother to birth her child and then bury them and send them to Heaven. The loss of Kreyton Hunter just two weeks shy of his 11th birthday changed my life forever. My grief won't go away like an illness. It will remain a constant variable until I am able to join him.
The loss of Kreyton began a whole new journey in my life. I learned the true definition of strength. I learned what loneliness really meant. I learned what true pain and heartache felt like. I have witnessed my 8-year-old daughter go through tragedy that many adults never face. The one blessing I have is that the Lord allowed me the opportunity to be Kreyton's mother forever. This taught me more than I could ever have dreamed of. Kreyton's life was filled with many opportunities especially the last year of his life. He was able to be part of scenarios that many humans never get the opportunity to experience. Sports and extra-curricular were all an extremely important part of Kreyton Hunter's life on Earth. He was a critical pivotal point in a baseball championship game last June with a tied score and two outs. His hit gained an RBI in the final inning of the game to allow his team a win. More than twice this past basketball season, Kreyton's team had a tie score and within 2-3 seconds left Kreyton shot the ball and scored the winning points. These are just a few incidents where he felt like a hero in his own eyes.
The last few hours of his life on Earth had many twists. I know without a doubt that Kreyton was able to hear me and know that my love for him was stronger than he could ever imagine. I vowed to him to make sure his memories and legacy continue to live in the hearts and minds of those around us. I have spent a great amount of time working on designing a foundation to help youth programs in our community in Kreyton's name. We also will give scholarships to graduating seniors pursuing post-high school education. Education was always a priority in my family. I know Kreyton at the young age of 10 had dreams and goals of what his academic future would hold.
I can't express the true heartache I feel in words. But, what I can do is work diligently to help others in honor of Kreyton. I also want to teach others about loss and grief. Child loss in unnatural but, a part of life that many must experience. No situation is the same just like no grief process is the same. Even today I am constantly searching for connections, support and some sense of help with those whom to have suffered the loss of a child. Every parent has dreams and aspirations for their children on Earth. Those dreams were taken away from Kreyton 16 weeks ago. I am now his voice and the only opportunity he has of helping others. If together he and I help one parent or child, I will feel that our mission is accomplished.
I know that I have a definite passion for helping others. I won't lie there are times where I think why me? Why Kreyton? What good can we be to others? I have to lean on my faith and know that in time I will be reunited with my son and oh what a reunion that will be! I want the very best for my children and if that very best means using my sorrow and grief to help others, then that is my purpose. Kreyton Hunter Quinn will not be forgotten as long as I am here on Earth!